I like the rawness of the beginning process, but it is not enough. Nevertheless, I still long for it as I continue.But if I were to stop trying to “fix” or “improve” on the initial impulse, it would not be, simply put, as much fun.
A while back I had a dream wherein a minor, background figure was a photographer who was lurking in a hallway. When I thought about what he might have to tell me, I heard “leave the mess.” I still think about this when my paintings become too tidy. It’s that need to find a satisfying (to me) balance of rawness and finish. To know when to stop and when to keep going.