When I knew I was going to build this house, I was shxt scared. And for the first couple of years after I moved in, I was also scared. I bought the land (which now would sell for what it cost me to build the whole house!) with money I made from selling my previous house which was bought with money from selling the house before which was also bought and renovated from a sale of a loft in Manhattan which was bought (then cheap) with money from my father. You get the picture, probably. It took me five years between buying the land to then start building.
The time was mostly to accumulate money, waiting to get some inheritance. In that time I designed and redesigned the house with the help of a series of architects (four in all). It was hard to get an architect to take me seriously as an artist, that I needed a good studio space. Most architects are taught, I have been told, that the residents come and go, so they are building a monument to themselves.
I knew I needed two things: a good studio and a good, peaceful living space. I did feel guilty about having all this money to build when most of my friends did not. I did a lot of meditation around money. I see money as a very friendly god with a big belly (of course) and a warm loving smile. This makes me feel good, worthy. Sometimes I even see my money god looking like Brad Pitt. Definitely blond!
I need money to make art. It is just how this society works. I'd like to sell more art, but I am not a very outgoing person and need someone else for promotion. It did take years to learn to accept money as value for my work. It was hard at first, even felt embarrassing. It now feels really good, makes my world a generous, valuable, kind place.
I live fairly simply, despite my luxurious house and land. I give my dog the best of care I can afford and maybe more than I can afford. I just don't think about money when it is used for something I believe in, like my dog and my work.
Money can be good, friendly, generous. People deserve payment of the best kind for their creativity. Being rewarded is a benefit to all of us. And in this culture the reward comes on the back of money.